Rolling Thunder

It’s good to be environmentally conscious, even if you’re a hard drinker. My buddy had his own machine shop, and would put toxic chemicals in his van for recycling, but then stop at the bar, and forget they were there. So, while saving the Earth, he was a menace to anyone within a two mile radius. One day the cops pulled us over, as we were leaving a downtown bar, but they found us not very drunk, due to slow service, so were heading to a better bar in Pawtucket. The cops were determined to bust us for something, so they started searching the van. I warned them it was a hazardous waste wagon / rolling toxic dump, but they just flashed skeptical smiles. My buddy pointed to a stack of permits for the chemicals, but they ignored that. We stood anxiously until the junior cop jumped violently from the back door, shaking one hand rapidly. We thought he’d been burned, but he was holding a used oil filter instead, oozing black, gritty, oil, from a rag, onto his pants and shoes. The senior cop looked down, into the black puddle on the ground, reflecting the sky-glass tower of the Providence Place Mall, and said, “So.. you boys heading out of town?” “Yeah,” we said. “Well” he replied, “you’d better get going.” As we rode up 95 my buddy smiled, saying, “I need to recycle that oil too!”